After... something happened-- [ and there's this sense of just. Bleak terror and overwhelming loneliness that accompanies just the memory of that, the floating and the whispers-- ]
[oh, she hates that feeling. she just instinctively sort of reaches out, resting her hand on top of otome's, worry bright and clear.]
... Yeah, of course you did. [beau mutters, letting out a shivery sigh.] It sounds like... you were either in Caleb's tower, or in the Happy Fun Ball of Tricks, but like, way more fucked up.
[ Her fingers twitch a little, and there's that thought again, that she's not worth Beau's worry, that she's merely making matters worse.
But Otome forces herself to take a deep breath, hand almost instinctively turning over to grasp Beau's grip. For-- something. Something to hold, to anchor herself. ]
I can't say anything felt... happy or fun, so I would have to agree with you there.
[ There's a pause, and then she laughs softly, but it's entirely fragile and honestly more of a whisper. ]
Do you know, I'm not even sure if this is real right now? I-- [ She'd floated so long, no one had been there, she'd wanted to die ]
[there's a little jolt of - something. anxiety, maybe, worry. but otome takes beau's hand, and beau doesn't hesitate to hold on in return. an anchor.]
Wasn't really all that fun when we went in either. [she mutters, but...
there's a pause, and then beau shifts to face her entirely. very gently, she brings their clasped hands up and presses a kiss to otome's knuckles. her emotions shift, and churn. confidence that isn't really hers, but a protectiveness that is.]
You're here, with me. [beau repeats.] This is real.
[ She's not used to protectiveness. She's used to being the protective one, to being the supportive one, the one who does her best to hold people together, whether that's with a suture and bandages or with heartbroken hugs and softly encouraging words.
This feels a little like the time Makoto and Fumi had both leapt to assist her when they'd finally realized how much she had kept to herself, but it's also not quite the same, and Otome's own emotions shift like an ocean. Surprise, uncertainty, then fondness and gratitude in softer swells and she meets Beau's eyes with her own welling up with tears.
This is real. ]
I don't really think I could dream up someone as incredible as you, anyway. [ With a little, watery laugh that really does nothing to detract from how sincere the statement is. ]
[ahhh - beau isn't good at this, or at least, she doesn't think she is. she panics a little at the tears, but the gratitude makes her pause, makes her take a deep breath. she bites her bottom lip, and then - otome says what she does, and beau's heart skips.
people don't really say things like this, to her. and - well, she's especially not expecting it after otome had to suffer through what beau imagines were horrors based on her memories.
it's hard, when there's evidence, eyes carved into her skin, but beau puts it aside, for a moment, and just keeps otome's hand against her cheek. there's a quiet little desire to hold, but she's afraid of hurting otome worse.]
... I think maybe you could dream up someone better. [beau says, voice a little hoarse.] But - even so. Anything I can do, I will.
[ There's a quiet little hint of amusement, as though Otome was struck by a thought that she decides not to voice (it's about biceps).
But stronger than that, though still muted, is that affection and a little bit of uncertainty. Like she's not sure if she should say anything at all. Like she's concerned about a risk.
But she's so very tired and that loneliness still has her ensconced in its grip, relenting only slightly when she focuses on the warmth of Beau's hand. So-- ]
Can I-- is it all right if I come a little closer?
[otome all about them biceps even when she's been poisoned, i respect it
otome's emotions are... confusing? maybe? beau's reaction to the affection is just a series of question marks in emotion form, but. there's no way she can say no to this. she doesn't want to say not to it. so she doesn't.
instead, she very carefully slides down to whatever otome is laid out on, and gives her both her hands.]
Put me where you want me. [she says, soft, emotions shivering wildly from affectionate to shy to sure to guilty.]
[ She's not sure where the guilt is coming from, only that she so dearly wants to get rid of it. Beau hasn't done a single thing wrong.
But Otome ponders this, then slowly, gingerly shifts into a seated position. Beau is right there and it is honestly hard to say whether this is an Otome thing or an alpha thing but within a few seconds, she's managed to hijack her lap.
She breathes out carefully after a second, releasing Beau's hands after maneuvering in the event she wants them back.
Mostly.
One pinky hooks around Beau's, loosely. ]
I won't take up too much of your time, but I might take up too much space instead.
beau cannot stop herself from blushing brightly at this, but at least she doesn't roll away this time. instead, otome lets go of her hands, and beau just... very carefully wraps her arms around otome's waist. or, well. the one. like hell is she unlinking her pinky with otome's.
she's just furiously embarrassed, but not in a bad way. even with alpha week, it takes her a second.]
... I don't mind if you do either. [she says, quieter, radiating pleased energy.]
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[her heart sinks at that. otome might feel it.]
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She winces, unable to stop it. ]
After... something happened-- [ and there's this sense of just. Bleak terror and overwhelming loneliness that accompanies just the memory of that, the floating and the whispers-- ]
I woke up in a grave. His coat was nearby.
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... Yeah, of course you did. [beau mutters, letting out a shivery sigh.] It sounds like... you were either in Caleb's tower, or in the Happy Fun Ball of Tricks, but like, way more fucked up.
The middle room sounds familiar, is all.
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But Otome forces herself to take a deep breath, hand almost instinctively turning over to grasp Beau's grip. For-- something. Something to hold, to anchor herself. ]
I can't say anything felt... happy or fun, so I would have to agree with you there.
[ There's a pause, and then she laughs softly, but it's entirely fragile and honestly more of a whisper. ]
Do you know, I'm not even sure if this is real right now? I-- [ She'd floated so long, no one had been there, she'd wanted to die ]
Am I really here with you?
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Wasn't really all that fun when we went in either. [she mutters, but...
there's a pause, and then beau shifts to face her entirely. very gently, she brings their clasped hands up and presses a kiss to otome's knuckles. her emotions shift, and churn. confidence that isn't really hers, but a protectiveness that is.]
You're here, with me. [beau repeats.] This is real.
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This feels a little like the time Makoto and Fumi had both leapt to assist her when they'd finally realized how much she had kept to herself, but it's also not quite the same, and Otome's own emotions shift like an ocean. Surprise, uncertainty, then fondness and gratitude in softer swells and she meets Beau's eyes with her own welling up with tears.
This is real. ]
I don't really think I could dream up someone as incredible as you, anyway. [ With a little, watery laugh that really does nothing to detract from how sincere the statement is. ]
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people don't really say things like this, to her. and - well, she's especially not expecting it after otome had to suffer through what beau imagines were horrors based on her memories.
it's hard, when there's evidence, eyes carved into her skin, but beau puts it aside, for a moment, and just keeps otome's hand against her cheek. there's a quiet little desire to hold, but she's afraid of hurting otome worse.]
... I think maybe you could dream up someone better. [beau says, voice a little hoarse.] But - even so. Anything I can do, I will.
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But stronger than that, though still muted, is that affection and a little bit of uncertainty. Like she's not sure if she should say anything at all. Like she's concerned about a risk.
But she's so very tired and that loneliness still has her ensconced in its grip, relenting only slightly when she focuses on the warmth of Beau's hand. So-- ]
Can I-- is it all right if I come a little closer?
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otome's emotions are... confusing? maybe? beau's reaction to the affection is just a series of question marks in emotion form, but. there's no way she can say no to this. she doesn't want to say not to it. so she doesn't.
instead, she very carefully slides down to whatever otome is laid out on, and gives her both her hands.]
Put me where you want me. [she says, soft, emotions shivering wildly from affectionate to shy to sure to guilty.]
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But Otome ponders this, then slowly, gingerly shifts into a seated position. Beau is right there and it is honestly hard to say whether this is an Otome thing or an alpha thing but within a few seconds, she's managed to hijack her lap.
She breathes out carefully after a second, releasing Beau's hands after maneuvering in the event she wants them back.
Mostly.
One pinky hooks around Beau's, loosely. ]
I won't take up too much of your time, but I might take up too much space instead.
[ It's said with a smile, though. ]
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beau cannot stop herself from blushing brightly at this, but at least she doesn't roll away this time. instead, otome lets go of her hands, and beau just... very carefully wraps her arms around otome's waist. or, well. the one. like hell is she unlinking her pinky with otome's.
she's just furiously embarrassed, but not in a bad way. even with alpha week, it takes her a second.]
... I don't mind if you do either. [she says, quieter, radiating pleased energy.]
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[ She says it softly though, still amused but very much relieved that Beau seems happier with this than any of the more uncomfortable emotions.
Again, she can't remember the last time she had this particular kind of closeness, but it's... comforting. And comfortable. ]